75 Of The Most “Damn Tourists” Moments Shared By People Who Live In Holiday Destinations

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Living in a tourist destination, around the canals of Amsterdam or the old city streets of Florence, may indeed sound very romantic, but turns out this is not always the case. In fact, it rarely is. How come? Well, the answer is in the first part of the title; namely, you get a bunch of super excited and very out-of-context tourists.

And so, unbeknownst to you, you become their guide for directions, their local entertainment, your house is on their must-see list, and you get it. So when someone asked people “who live in holiday destinations, what's your most ridiculous 'damn tourists' moment” on r/AskReddit, it was destined to become a one hell of a read.

From people casually walking inside your home, thinking it’s one of the sightseeing spots, to tourists complimenting your English, these are some of the things that happen when you live in places from the fridge magnets.


Canadian Rockies - Tourists who pull over on the side of the road to get close-up pictures of bear cubs. Mama bear is nearby and is ready to re-enact The Revenant with you.

Image credits: GoTron88


NYC. Post 9/11, walking past the ruins of the World Trade Center and some middle-aged women tourists are chatting and laughing and posing with the ruins of the WTC behind them for a group shot. I worked there and was lucky not to be in the building when it happened. I was just so infuriated that I yelled out "it's not f**king Disney Land" and they lost their smiles. (Have some decorum, tourists).

Image credits: Offthepoint


We had a Japanese couple put their toddler on the back of a baby black bear that was mulling about on the side of the highway.

Natural selection was unfortunately not invoked in this instance.

Image credits: TL10


When I was a teenager, I worked at an airboat rental dock/alligator park near the Everglades. We'd always get a tour bus full of foreigners and yankees coming in from Miami every couple of days during snowbird season.

Had a f**king guy ask "Hey, are we allowed to swim in the water?" while he was standing in front of a 14 foot stuffed gator flanked by four 6 foot water moccasin skins. We'd also get people who'd complain about the heat and the bugs. Like...holy f**king s**t you just came to the largest wetland in the country, what exactly were you expecting?

My favorite was "can you turn down the fan, my children don't like the noise." Then don't sign up to take a ride on a boat that's propelled by a giant propeller.

Image credits: ScramblesTD


Live in a ski town adjacent to Yellowstone National Park...

People have asked "At what elevation do the deer turn into elk" "Where do the moguls go in the summer?"

My favorite was when I worked at a lodge right in front of the Tetons during wildfire season...

"Can't you guys turn off the smoke? It's ruining my view and we paid way too much for this vacation and I can't even see the mountains." Yes, lady, it's all one big tv screen in front of our hotel...

Image credits: shradicalwyo


Worked at a ski area in western NC and had a lady from Florida ask me what we did with all the snow in the summertime. Told her we trucked it all into a refrigerated cave and she bought it.

Image credits: Kinnakeet


My older brother lives in Celebration, FL. Back when it was first designed and built, people didn't seem to understand exactly what it was. Was it a tourist attraction? A park? A town?

Some of my brother's friends related a time when they were sitting down for dinner and, having forgotten to lock their front door, were greeted by some tourists who decided to just walk around inside their apartment. The visitors had to be told that, no, this isn't a tourist attraction. It's a real home and real people live here, so please leave.

Image credits: interface2x


Amsterdam: any tourist with a bike is a "damn tourist"

Image credits: webdevop


Coastal Maine checking in - people lose their s**t over lobsters and shell out tons of money for anything with a lobster on it.

Cheap shot glass? Eh. Cheap shot glass with a lobster stuck on it? I'll give you $7.75 for it!

Lollipop? Whatever. Lollipop shaped like a lobster?! Definitely worth $5, better get one for each kid back home.

Normal pullover hoodie? Boring. Hoodie with a motherf**king LOBSTER embroidered on it at $50 a piece?!? Oh my GOD just take my money!!

Image credits: gymger


Currently live in India / Sri Lanka - white people aka foreigners walking barefoot everywhere... Like Christ, I get you're on your big 'Indian adventure' but put on some shoes. Have you seen how much s**t is on the ground?!

Image credits: Lyle-Z-Crocodile


In Australia, for some unknown reason, tourists won't swim in-between the safety flags. It's like they think it's the bunny hill of the beach. It's not, the locals swim between the flags because we don't want to die.

Also, if I offer you sunblock and a hat, take it. This isn't Europe, I've gotten sunburnt in 15mims, you will bake regardless of your skin colour/nationality.

It's always so strange to me that Australia gets a bad wrap for all these things that are "trying to kill you" but I think sometimes tourist are just trying to get killed. Soooo many examples of this!

Image credits: starcaster


Not a specific tourist destination, but I'm always amused by Europeans who can't comprehend how big Canada is.

I'll be in Niagara or Toronto, and they'll ask for directions to Whistler. "You're gonna want to go West for a long time"

"Like an hour? Two hours?"

"Try a week"

Image credits: Mr_Nexxus


I live in Taos, NM...as well as being a ski destination, there is a really, really old (still-inhabited!) pueblo. Lots of Native American people here.

And being NM, we get lots of Texans in the summer. My (Native) friend is a river rafting guide and shared this gem with me:

She was on a raft with a family...mom, dad, teenage son and daughter. Friend points out a bighorn sheep up ahead, everyone starts freaking out.

Texan Mom: "So since there's game, do you ever see the Indians hunting out here?"

Friend: "Excuse me?"

Texan Mom: "Like, the Indians. They still live out here, right?"

Teenage Daughter: (realizes my friend is Native) "MOM"

Texan Mom: "What, I'm just asking!"

Friend: "Actually, most of us just go to the grocery store."

Texan Mom: "Wow, you're an Indian? Your English is like, almost perfect!"

Teenage Daughter: "MOM!!!!"

Image credits: VenomousJackalope


I find it super annoying when I see people parked on the side of the road trying to lure the Bears closer to their cars with food. Even worse when we pull up and warn them not to and their response is "chill out bro, it's only a bear" ........also, when people just decide to run up to baby deer and bother it, its mom is nearby and will go crazy. There's a reason why there are so many warning signs to not bother the wild creatures and to keep your distance. Oh and littering, take your damn food wrapper and put it in a trash can, a**hole. This is not only the animals' home but it's mine too so show some respect.

Image credits: tazbunny


I work at a beach, and people always complain about the seaweed that washes up, and they believe me when I say that there's a seaweed filter in the jetty (which is a formation of huge rocks jetting out into the ocean to collect sand on one side) and that it was broken and it, instead of sucking the seaweed in, it's shooting it out and the part that would fix it comes from Japan and it's going to be fixed in 3 weeks. Tourists believe this every time.

Image credits: creaghlj


Living in NYC - tourists stop in the middle of the sidewalk to:

Look up at the tall buildings

Look at a map (it's a grid people, everything north of 14th is on a grid.

Stop to take pictures of stupid s**t (Gee, look honey at the statue of a fat Italian guy holding a pizza...)

Step to the side and let us people get to work - its very simple.

Image credits: Tsquare43


Down at the beach, see some very pasty tourists, probably from Iowa or Kansas or somewhere in the middle of a cornfield. They are completely confused about waves. Like, they're standing ankle-deep a few feet from the shore, a tiny wave ebbs up, they stagger back and yell something like "WOW!" or "OOOPS!". Wave goes away, they inch forward again. Mind you these weren't even waves, you could make bigger flows in your bathtub. And yet these people were completely astounded by the concept.

Image credits: m_laria


I live near Niagara Falls, and it seems like every time I go there are a couple of people attempting to sit on, hang on, or even get past the guard rails for a better photo opportunity. Idk if they just don't realize how fast the water is actually moving or what, but I've had a panic attack for them every time I've seen this

Image credits: BronusSwagner


used to live in a very popular destination for exotic vacations. The one time that will always remember is the time I went to the local shopping mall and eavesdropped into a conversation with Asians showing safari pictures. They were showing pictures of them holding lion cubs. They were explaining how they saw baby lions without their mother and decided to get out of their car and pick them up for pictures. I cannot believe how stupid some people are.

Image credits: willpunchyou


I work as a ski lift operator in Aspen. Had this one dad let his kid take a wiz right in the middle of the lift line. Had to shovel more urine than expected that day.

Image credits: flooglehorn


Another NYC one: Walking to work one day and I hear shouts of "OH MY GOD IS THAT JAY-Z?!?! GET A PICTURE QUICK"

No, midwestern tourists, that is not Jay-Z. That man looks nothing like Jay-Z. He's at least 150 pounds heavier than Jay-Z. Being a black dude in a Lambo doesn't automatically make him Jay-Z.

Image credits: ParaTodoMalMezcal


I was wakeboarding with a couple of buddies just last summer and a boat with 15 or so Asian people came right next to us. They looked at us like f**king Godzilla just rose from the ocean and in a couple of seconds, every single one of them whipped out their camera/iPad and started taking pictures. Then they just drove off.

Seriously, who would want to have pictures of some hairy wet dude in their vacation album

Image credits: yabucek


I used to be a street artist in the New Orleans French quarter. One day I'm sitting by my paintings, reading a book and some lady came up and put a dollar in my coffee. I guess she thought I was begging. Her heart was in the right place, but she ruined my coffee.

Image credits: reddit


New Orleans checking in. I suppose it's not the WORST thing ever, but the elevator in the parking garage I use for work had clearly been peed in since [Mardi Gras started]. Also, during Mardi Gras, the garage management hangs up "please don't pee in the lobby" signs. Sighhhh...

Image credits: endolphining


When I was 14, I worked for the Parks Commission in Niagara Falls. I've been asked a lot of dumb tourist questions during my time there, but there are two that really take the cake.

"Does the Maid of the Mist ride up the falls?" Asked by a grown man. I could understand a 5 yr old child with no understanding of physics, but seriously no adult should ever ask that question.

"Which falls belongs to what country?" Asked by a large Texan (I could tell by the accent and the huge belt buckle). I told him that the Horseshoe Falls were in Canada and the American and Bridal Veil falls were in the US. "NO!" he shouts back to me. "The larger one belongs to the US because everything in the US is bigger!". "Umm ok" I squeaked out. He must have been looking for a fight.

Image credits: Jebus905


Anyone who comes to Los Angeles, assumes Hollywood and the actual Hollywood neighborhoods are the same. actors rarely hang out in Hollywood. that's where you find the heroin addicts.

Image credits: rikjames90


I've seen a whole group of Asian tourists taking pictures of the sky where the world trade center used to be. Yes, the sky.

Image credits: ThePocketCat


From Ireland. Had more than a few people ask about leprechauns. A friend actually convinced 2 Americans that they live in a commune in Donegal. They went straight out and bought bus tickets.

Image credits: badgerbother89


Former Floridian who worked at Margaritaville in Key West. It was an absolute cesspool of idiocy. There would be people who would get off the cruise ships (always Carnival) and ask what country they were in and refused to believe that KW was in the U.S. There were always new and crazy varieties of drunken nonsense: Public sex, lighting off fireworks in the middle of Duval Street on an average day, and more often than you'd think, robbing a bank and then going and sitting down at the bar for a beer.

Image credits: MsSHRR


I grew up in San Francisco which is kind of a tourist destination. I remember getting dinner somewhere touristy once and overhearing tourists complaining about all the hills and one of them hoping that the next earthquake would level the city so it would be easier to get around...

Image credits: clear_7


I am an ex-pat who lives in Amsterdam. Getting stopped for directions is pretty common in my area, but the best was the American accented lady who stopped me for directions VERY LOUDLY AND CLEARLY.

Directions were given, as well as thanks from the lady, who proceeded to say "by the way, your English is great!" with the tone one reserves for small children and/or mental patients.

"Thanks!" I responded, "I'm American."


My parents used to run a semi-popular restaurant in Niagara Falls. Had some people from the southern states ask them where to go skiing... in Ontario... in August...


Okay here are a few for Australia:

Don't jump off that into the water - yes locals are doing it, but they've been doing it since they were 10

Wear proper shoes - if you're going for a bushwalk, wear the right footwear

You didn't just become a 4WD expert, maybe don't drive there

If you see a warning sign follow it - saw some people dip their kids into the water at a beach which is notorious for jellyfish, everyone else is wearing a stringer suit, except the 5year olds. Also, don't freaking fish there! There's a no fishing sign near my place, it's not to be a buzz kill. It's because the land near the water was used to produce Agent Orange. Those fish will kill you....slowly.


I live in the Dominican Republic. This time of year is CRAZY with drunken tourists. I went to the grocery store in town, which was packed, and on my way back, saw a guy laying in the middle of the road.

No one seemed concerned, and people were just swerving around him. I wasn't sure if he'd gotten hit, or what has going on. As I get closer, he stands up, and I see he has a bottle of rum in each hand. He takes a swig, yells "WOOO HOOO", bounces off my car, and then stumbles off the road.

I s**t you not, two days later, at night (I went out to party a little), my buddy was driving my car, and he came inches from running over a different guy, passed out in the same damn spot. Only this time, a couple of guys ran out and drug him off the road. And, he had a bottle of rum in each hand...



I work near Times Square (tourist capital). My biggest gripe is escalators. When exiting, FFS don't just stop and stand right at the bottom or top, then look surprised/annoyed when your getting shoved out of the way. If you haven't noticed, there are a lot of people here, some of which also need to exit the escalator.


I live close to the Mall of America, and I hardly ever go there because of all the tourists. Some of them even bring their luggage to the mall with them.

They want to take pictures of everything, so you have to always keep watch to make sure you're not photo-bombing someone.

Then, there's the whole "lots of people from different countries bringing some sickness with them that I'm not immune to". It's not terrible, but it's a breeding ground for new illnesses and bad colds. I'm not saying that those from out of the country are all sick or anything, just that different countries have different sicknesses that not everyone is used to.

Because they haven't been to the mall before, they're slow walkers and take up the entire hallway so we locals can't get to the shop we want to.

It sounds like I'm some old curmudgeon, but on slower days, the mall can be quite nice. Great place to look for a gift, as there are soooo many stores there. Great place to go walking in the morning, and lots of good people-watching.

It's just the busy days or holiday season(s) that make me avoid the place like the plague.


My family has a house just a block away from a wide, spacious beach. Even at the peak of summer, there is plenty of room for tourists. Despite all of the space, we are constantly having to move our beach chairs and blanket because they always get uncomfortably close. And there is nothing tourists love more than feeding the seagulls! Sorry, I'd rather not spend my afternoon dodging bird s**t because you're trying to get a photo of a seagull with a Dorito.


I live in London. Millions of tourists, with large groups of European teens in matching rucksacks getting in the way. All of whom appear to be obsessed with buying shoes, loads of shoes. Like shoes don't exist in their motherlands


My girlfriend and I live in a ski resort in Canada, the best ones we've seen so far: Crazy Asians running up to black bears to try and get pictures with them.

I've seen an American guy attack a vending machine because it wouldn't "take his goddamn American dollars"

My girlfriend worked in a hotel and a guest leave a note saying thank you for providing the baby black bears out the back of the hotel for our kids to play with.

Tourists manage to drive their cars through the pedestrianized village center and parking wherever the they please.


Tourism in Iceland has been booming the past few years. There's always something in the news (and I have only lived here for about six months)

Dude just drowned here in Iceland because he climbed onto the rocks and was swept away by a wave.

apparently, tourists jumped on icebergs floating around

last summer there was a huge outrage about people relieving themselves in the wild x

And everyone complains that stuff closes at 10 with a few exceptions (one being where I happened to work) It's f**king Iceland people! 350,000 people on a f**king good day, for f**ks sake, there's no need for anything to be open late.

it's quite entertaining.


I grew up in Toms River NJ. Just outside seaside heights. The location of "Jersey Shore".

No, I do not know Snooki. No, I do not know the other ones. No, I've never been to those bars. No, I don't fist pump.

Those folks are referred to as Benny's. Which from what I gather, means Bayonne Edison Newark, New York.


On the top of the Sunshine Skyway Bridge in Florida, I saw these tourists in a convertible Mustang doing the most amazingly stupid thing. The driver was rolling along at about 40mph so that his passenger, who was standing straight up in the vehicle, could take photos.


I'm in NYC. Couples weeks ago a load of Chinese teen tourists entered the rotating doors of Victorias Secret on 34th and just... stood there. They weren't stuck, it just took them a long time to realize that they had to push.

NY is very fast-paced and tourists just slow the whole operation down. Standing directly in front of subway entrances, walking downstairs and stopping at the bottom, etc. I am not a patient person but neither do I publicly confront people -- afraid of getting stabbed -- so I just get stressed out.


Mexico. We get lots of tourists at our ruin sites. Years ago, we could climb the pyramids at Chichen Itzá, I did when I was around 8 years old or so, I really don't remember.. But one day an old lady tourist decided she could climb it, despite being, what.. 99? and f**king fell down the stairs and died.

Now, absolutely every ruin is closed off and you're not allowed to climb up them anymore. I had the privilege of doing it and basked in the glorious view from the very top of many pyramids.. Kinda sucks to go back there and just stare at a pile of rocks now.


In Florida, I was swimming at the beach and a stingray decided to hang out with everyone. It was there almost every day I went to the beach and never bothered anyone. This family started screaming and kicking around (bad idea??) because of it. It was just chilling, man. Leave it be.


I used to live in Vienna and my sister and I would lie in the grass in a park in front of a big, famous castle (Schloss schönbrunn) and somehow a group of Asian tourist starts to take photos of us.


Seeing people drown pretty much all the time.

You never learned to swim, and you want to go jump in the ocean? Ever heard of a riptide, dummy?


When my family was in Scotland we met a family planning to travel to the US for a week. We asked where they were visiting and they planned to start in New York and drive across the country to Los Angeles hitting all the major sites in between. Let me reiterate, they planned to be in the US for a week. We tried and failed to convince them this was not going to work.


Boston here - while I appreciate the fact that some visitors really do understand that if they're planning on staying downtown and only intend to visit downtown, NO CAR IS NECESSARY, I wish more visitors would take the time to familiarize themselves with how public transportation actually works.

Please don't ask the vehicle operators for directions, please don't board the bus or train while people are getting off, it's not a good idea to "surf" by standing and not holding onto a rail, please remove your gigantic backpack that doubles the amount of space you're taking up on a seriously crowded bus or train, and for the love of all that is good and true in the world, please either walk up the escalator or keep to the right so others can pass you. people say Bostonians are unfriendly, which is so not true. we just want to get where we are going with minimal interruption. we understand that you aren't super experienced with public transportation, just understand that when you fly home, another person who is also inexperienced is coming to take your place.


I saw an adult Chinese tourist help his child take a c**p on the grassy area of a parking lot not too far from the main door entrance of a kids toy store.


Had a group of American girls come into the university shop I was working at. They were over for a sport tournament I think and were staying in the dorms.

One of them asks if she can use a traveler's cheque to pay for her item, snack food, and some trinkets (about £20).

Ok says the manager and the girls pull out traveler's checks that are in dollars, not sterling. They then proceed to throw a massive hissy fit as 'you said we could use them'

It had apparently not occurred to the girls, their parents, or any of their chaperones that England and America had different currencies.

Edit to add these were not young girls they were in the 16-18 age group


I live in a very rural, historic-colonial area of New England. Every fall we get hoards of leaf peepers. That's slang for people from the city (New York, Boston, etc.) who come up north to look at all the pretty colors as the trees change.

My town has one of the longest, oldest covered bridges in the country. It's still in use for road traffic and is one of the only bridges over Connecticut for a few miles.

The majority of leaf-peepers assume because the bridge is old, it's a historical landmark and is open for exploration. So many times I'll try to cross that bridge only to stop before a group of 5-6 people freaking out because they just assumed it's for foot traffic.

These same types of people, when they try to then cross that bridge with their cars after learning that's what it's for, will still almost cause accidents. It's an ancient wooden structure with minimal lighting and very narrow lanes. Tourists get nervous driving so close to the walls, so they drive down the middle and get stuck when confronted with oncoming traffic.

TL;DR; Historical structures that are still in common use bewilder and terrify people not familiar with this concept. Also, tourists will assume anything with a historical placard that isn't fenced off is fair game to climb all over.


Grew up in a College town that had not one, but TWO colleges (well it was a JC but amounted to the same thing). The year before I graduate High School, the town is listed in Playboy's Top 10 hottest cities. Go to sign up for classes at the JC and can't get any of my classes because douches from as far away as Maine (this is in California) are signing up for those classes.

And let's not forget how bad the surf spots get in Sept/Oct when everybody thinks they can surf. The spots get overcrowded and the kooks make the surf more dangerous. Just paddle over there and grab those s**t waves while you learn to stand up. It's been over 15 years and I'm still salty as f**k.


I lived in the Italian-speaking part of Switzerland for a while, and on my bus-commute home, I overheard an American woman trying to figure out if it was the correct bus to get her to the village where I lived, but she didn't know Italian and was holding up the line. So, just to be nice, I offered to translate for her and solved her problem. She didn't say thank you and sat down for the ride.

When we arrived, we started walking up the hill from the bus station next to each other, and I asked "so, where are you from, and why are you visiting my tiny village?". She responded "I don't talk to strangers" and sped up.

I just laughed at her and replied, "What, are you a 7-year-old little girl? I just helped you on the bus back there, and now you're being rude to me?" No response.


I stopped counting the number of times I've seen people go the wrong way around a roundabout.


Not necessarily a holiday destination but I worked in a wildlife rehab park inside a national park in Bolivia that is quite popular. On more than one occasion I was out walking private trails with our resident puma and I had tourists run through the barbwire fences and keep out signs to get closer to her. Literally was only my quick reflexes that saved at least 5 people from death or serious injury


Driving 10 mph during rush hour taking pictures with their phones is the one that always pisses me off.


A woman wandering around Penn Station shouting angrily into her cellphone that "I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY THE F**K THE F**KING GUIDEBOOK TOLD ME TO COME HERE TO GRAND CENTRAL THIS PLACE IS GODDAMN HIDEOUS"


In Seattle, we have the "Ride the Duck" tours that go on the road and in the water. The things have a PA system so everyone within a block can hear them. They constantly make remarks about people on the street and if I'm dressed a little weird, it's pretty damn awkward to have a group of tourists with duck whistles taking your picture from a boat on wheels while the announcer talks about the colorful Seattle culture in reference to me. A**holes.


I live in a beach town. Worked at a convenience store as a teen. Had a French Canadian guy think 5lb bags of ice were free, and didn't get the concept that he had to pay for them. All while maintaining his exaggerated accent and speaking in broken English


Lived in DC and now in downtown Miami so I've gotten used to tourists and don't really mind them. One incident does still stick in my craw. 8:30 am. Dupont Circle station. I need to put 20 cents on my fare card. An entire troupe of boyscouts are at all of the machines trying to figure them out like it's some sort of complicated puzzle. They were spread out throughout the entire room so that there wasn't a single open machine. I almost killed children that day.

If you go to DC and are going to ride the metro and don't want to piss off locals:

If you have a big group, don't go during rush hour.

If you can't figure out the machines, just use one.

Stand on the goddamn right on the escalator.

Let people off before you get on.

Don't talk to me.


PHILADELPHIA IS NOT SMALL all those landmarks you want to see? The art museum, The liberty bell, The love statue, Market Street, South Street, The Macy store where Wanamaker was, independence hall, pat's and Geno's s**tties cheesesteaks? They have miles in between each other. You will not be able to walk that in a day. Also rocky wasn't real and that was a 20-mile MONTAGE that Sylvester Stallone ran. Good luck.


I live in wine country, where there are about 3200 wineries in the two counties. We have semi-serious issues with drunk driving tourists on the weekends here from about March through November.


My dad was a bus driver in Wales and one of his regular routes was to the bottom of Snowdon, I'd get regular stories of tourists who were pissed off that the bus didn't go to the top of the mountain and he even had one ask him if they could get a bottle of champagne at the top.


Living in Cornwall, UK sucks from May to September. Traffic is ridiculous, if you want to go anywhere you need to leave at least an hour for traffic. Roads are for driving on not for walking on especially when there is a friggin pavement for you! I don't know where in the world it's ok to walk in front of a car that is in motion but you see tourists (adults with their children) walk straight in front of a moving car (more so in the smaller seaside towns) and give you the death stare for daring to drive ON THE ROAD! The worst I've seen though was at Portreath beach last summer, the tide was coming in and there was this bloke with his kid's rock pooling, saw that the water was getting close but instead kept looking in the rock pools with his young children; my SO had to tell him that he was about to get cut off by the water if he didn't get off the rocks. Use some common sense, if you wouldn't do it at home don't do it on holiday!


I live in one of the most boring states in America, but every year more and more people keep coming down for our beaches and tax-free shopping. No, I will not give you three gallons of free water ice so you can throw your daughter's birthday party in our tiny store. Get your twenty kids off my counters and out of my spoon cup. I don't care if the ice cream place on the boardwalk gave you a free milkshake.

I hate tourists. Don't even get me started on the driving.


I once overheard a tourist complaining that the paper map she was looking at didn't have a "you are here" thing on it.


working in beach tourist town

tourist: "which way is the beach?"

me: "what beach are you trying to go to?"

tourist (getting angry at me for not immediately answering): "Any beach it doesn't matter"

me: "well technically any direction you go you'll end up at a beach..."


I live in England (in a city that's about 150 miles from London) and tourists who end up here often seem perplexed at the fact that they are not in London. They don't seem to expect to see the countryside.


Segway tours. God damnit! You're taking up the whole running path!


Some lady parked her car in front of our house, took out a bunch of art supplies, and started painting a canvas of one of the old outbuildings. My place is on a scenic byway so we see lots of summer tourists, but that was...different. I mean, the house is right there, she could have maybe walked up and said hi or something first.

We also frequently get tourists stopping in the road during the summer to take photos of the deer and elk in the back yard of apple trees. We wave from the back porch.


I live near Loch Lomond and had an American couple ask if I've ever seen Nessie in the loch...

Also, there's only one road in and out of the area coming from Glasgow, without taking a 2-hour detour, so you know that gets packed with absolute c**ts towing boats every summer on the one warm day lol


Pumped gas in high school in a decently popular lake community. In the summertime, everyone would stop for directions. I once had a couple say they were looking for a popular city in Delaware. They saw a sign for a town with the same name. Had to explain that they were literally 200 miles away and to just plug it into their GPS. They then got gas and argued with me cause they wanted to pump it on their own. I said no, and they called the police. 5-0 came (my uncle btw) and told them that they were wasting his time. Guy argued and my uncle saw a pipe in their car. Found weed in the car and arrested him. It was Saturday and he couldn't get out until Monday. Pretty funny s**t. TL;DR Use your GPS, if in NJ let the people pump your gas, and don't leave your pipe out in the car.


London here. We have 270 underground stations and if you want us to know which one you're talking about, give us the proper name. You want to go to Notting? Can't help you. You want to go to Notting Hill Gate? Sure.


Lived near Honolulu.

Tourists...you make a 14-minute trip take 2 hours. Get off my roads!